We're at breaking point. Careers are on hold, professional relationships are being reevaluated, and many software developers are losing their jobs.

At times like this, networking becomes essential if careers are to be put back on track. But how do we network, when meetups and hackathons and in-person conferences are being canceled? And more: how can we prevent frustration when, after making an initial networking contact, nothing results from it?

The answer to these questions becomes straightforward once you consider the human element in networking. Putting first things first, networking is a process, not an event. To be more precise: it is a long-term strategy of building relationships.

You have probably seen this mistake many times. People don't contact anyone in their professional network for a long time, and then suddenly appear, asking for a job.

If you start an initial networking conversation with: "I was laid off. I need a job," then frustration on your part will probably follow. Asking for a job in a first networking conversation is like proposing marriage on a first date. It puts people off.

Networking is not about you and your job. It's about relationships, projects, and ideas. Try an experiment. Make a cold approach to someone and talk about your resume. Approach a second person, show some curiosity, and talk about ideas and plans. You will see a difference in the responses.

In fact, when you network, you are unlikely to see tangible results for months or even years. So don't be disappointed if you don't get instant results from an initial conversation, or from a second or third. Networking is about nurturing relationships. It's about planting seeds. Keep that in mind and you will have no reason to become frustrated.

Also, you don't necessarily need to attend in-person events to build your network. There are great online communities such as DEV.to, and Slack channels where you can start to set the stage and talk about your projects and ideas, and about people. With resources like these, and with Zoom calls here and there, it is easy to show authenticity and your personal side to colleagues. This will be to your benefit, since authenticity and personality accelerate the process of building relationships.

By the way, this networking strategy can also be applied to the world of open-source contributions. I have seen developers become frustrated after making a contribution to a project, expecting (but not receiving) some kind of instant recognition.

That's not how open-source contributions work. It takes time to be recognized by other developers. It's a process that requires you to demonstrate mastery, trustworthiness, and respect.

Before sending a message to your professional contacts or starting an initial conversation, remember that networking does not differ from other relationship-building activities. It is a long-term process requiring patience, curiosity, and authenticity on your part. Let your relationships develop naturally, and you will not be disappointed.

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